Self-Relationship Check-In Mad Lib Edition

(Because Thinking Is Hard Sometimes)

Instructions:
Fill in the blanks quickly. Do not overthink.
Your first answer is usually the most honest one.

There are no wrong answers. There is just information.

1. When I mess up, the first thing I usually tell myself is:

“____________________________________________.”

(Examples: “I should’ve known better,” “Of course I did,” “Wow, that was dumb,” “Okay, that sucked.”)

2. When I’m tired, my default response is to:

____________________________________________.

(Examples: push through, cancel everything, scroll, snap at people, ignore it, lie to myself.)

3. When I feel behind, I tend to assume it means:

____________________________________________.

(Examples: I’m failing, I’m lazy, I can’t keep up, something is wrong with me.)

4. If my inner voice had a tone, it would sound:

____________________________________________.

(Examples: disappointed teacher, exhausted parent, drill sergeant, sarcastic friend, tired but kind.)

5. When no one is watching, I usually:

____________________________________________.

(Examples: collapse, numb out, avoid things I care about, overthink, actually take care of myself.)

6. The thing I’m hardest on myself about lately is:

____________________________________________.

(Be specific. Vague shame loves hiding.)

7. When I don’t follow through, I usually respond by:

____________________________________________.

(Examples: adjusting the plan, pretending it didn’t matter, mentally punishing myself, giving up.)

8. Right now, my relationship with myself feels:

____________________________________________.

(Examples: tense, fragile, improving, exhausting, complicated but trying.)

The Reframe Section (Do Not Skip This)

Based on what I wrote above, the thing I probably need more of right now is:

____________________________________________.

And the thing I might need less of is:

____________________________________________.

(Examples: more rest, more structure, more honesty, less pressure, less pretending, less self-criticism.)

Optional But Powerful

Rewrite one sentence you filled in earlier so it is:

  • honest

  • direct

  • not cruel

Original thought:

“____________________________________________.”

New version:

“____________________________________________.”

If this feels awkward, congratulations. That means you’re interrupting a habit.

Important Notes From Your Friendly Neighborhood Therapist

  • This is not about fixing yourself

  • This is about noticing patterns without attacking yourself

  • Awareness without safety turns into shame

  • Safety is what allows change

If this brought things up, that’s not a problem. That’s the point.

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